| Through opiate eyes |
[29 Jan 2010|03:45pm] |
Twice I've had the opportunity of making your acquaintance. Your familiar eyes may change in colour but I'd recognize them anywhere, even after all this time. I can tell by your reception that I haven't changed a bit. From blue to brown and now grey you still look at me with that look of petulance. If your presence wasn't so malignant I might be impressed with your seamless transition to your new pair of eyes. Those eyes mean something different to me now and you tread on unfamiliar ground yet you still manage to enter me in that way you've always done like a hot knife through butter.
You've reduced me once but I was an easy kill. Your hands aren't quite as big as they once were nor am I quite as small. Bruised ribs, skinned cheekbone, dried blood in the corners of my mouth; I always was did have a penchant for nostalgia. Try again please. Little voice stammering in fffear. Crying out in pain now! Remember? You can hear it reverberating in the recesses of your mind can't you and it sounds like paradise. Like a pane of glass met by a stone, I do shatter so satisfyingly visceral, don't I? TRY AGAIN!
-----Well played old friend-----
How unequivocally astute. My sense of pride proclaims itself false as my one frailty materializes with a sharp pang. Where you lack in eloquence and wavering coherence you most certainly make up for in shrewd resourcefulness. Bruise my ribs until luminous and opaque but inside does beat a heart and the only one capable of damaging it is the one vessel you inhabit. It took our first encounter to make me however it's becoming quite clear that our second poses the threat of potentially breaking me. And so it begins...
Those grey eyes are the chink in my armour. All it took were your words so acidic, so gingerly composed and here we are again. Behind the locked door of the bathroom staring into the mirror trying recognize something live behind the tired, vacant eyes looking back at me. If it wasn't for the pain resonating in the pit of my stomach I could convinced myself that I was dead. 'I planned to use you until your beauty ran out, I just didn't think it would be so soon.'The orgasmic gratification you derive from each cutting blow is palpable. And then, just like that you're gone. Your presence was fleeting yet even more biting than our last encounter.
Twice I've had the displeasure of making your acquaintance. Twice you've managed to destroy me but not once have I heard an apology.
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[16 Apr 2009|12:24pm] |
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Attention friends! If you're interested the film Purgatory Comics in which I starred will be debuting at the Lancaster film festival in Pennsylvania. It's on a Saturday, May 2nd. Several films will be showcased however ours will be headlining. Woot! Come hang out with me and see my movie while you're at it. It'll be fun!!
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[19 Mar 2009|11:59am] |
My listings will be ending in a few hours. This is a sample of what's up at the moment. I'll be shooting more this week. It's all definitely worth a look. I'll be getting to the more 50's bombshell stuff hopefully this week as the majority of it has been more indie than anything.
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[15 Mar 2009|06:11pm] |
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Life sucks at the moment. No wait that's an understatement- It's been a soul draining, looks stealing, nerve frying shitfest. I haven't had time for a proper update yet which isn't necessarily that big a deal as there's nothing worthy of report. All of those sayings you've heard 'when it rains it pours' or my personal fav 'once you get your head together your ass falls apart' are true. I feel like I'm being pulled in every which direction except for the one I want to go in. I hate being so vague and cryptic however there's only so much information I'm comfortable sharing. I'm sure a lot more sense could be made of this if a fraction was disclosed but lets just say your mind and your instincts are a lot safer to trust than your heart sometimes. Most times really.
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[14 Mar 2009|02:34am] |
I'm going to be clearing out pretty much all of my inventory. Here's one from last nights shoot. Only 10 billion more to go. *sigh*.*yawn*.*stretch*. Must get sleep. Hopefully the boobies aren't too distracting.
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[13 Mar 2009|01:15pm] |
Google image the word yamaka and you'll find...
( Read more... )
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[07 Mar 2009|05:49pm] |
I get the jist of the sitch- people are throwing him their cigarettes and he stashes them. Who the fuck is lighting them?
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[14 Feb 2009|02:37am] |
I had a play with my new hairstyle tonight and became inspired to do something ultra 2001. Oh yeah. Bathroom self portraits baby.
( Read more... )
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[11 Feb 2009|11:07pm] |
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If anyone wants to add me on aim it's: Wasabimouthwash
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[08 Feb 2009|05:31pm] |
Attention Californian's
I'm moving to your coast! I've fallen on the ice for the last time. I'm trading in doom and gloom and death for palm trees and open toe shoes. My problem is I have no lay of the land. California is huge. So, where to go? Northern? Southern? It should be in commuting distance to a major city. Also baring in mind that we have 2 pit bulls (they're illegal in some places). If possible we'd like at least a little bit of a financial break as the cost of living here is ridiculous and that would be an added bonus. Benn has added "nowhere *too* hot".
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[31 Jan 2009|09:24pm] |
I'm up at 6 am every morning and there are only 2 days out of the week that I get to sleep in. When I say 'sleep in' even 9 is a treat. All I ask for is some peaceful, painless, uninterrupted sleep. Today was a 'sleep in' day for me. Guess how I woke up! Ever shove a kiwi up your urethra? No? Well technically neither have I-BUT I've had the distinct pleasure of knowing just what that feels like. Lucky me!
Walking was a definite no go, Nothing I did was making the discomfort cease and since that kind of thing is super abnormal it was off to the doc with me. Turns out I have a urinary tract infection. How this happened it beyond me considering the hygiene freak I am. I'm thinking the 2 day sexathon has something to do with it. I took my first dose of cipro and am taking it easy because it's not doing my tummy any favors.
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[26 Jan 2009|08:26am] |
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Since my sister has developed new sleeping habits aka going to be after 1 a.m she's become particularly difficult to wake in the mornings. This morning she was awoken courtesy of a speaker next to her head and the song Girls by Prodigy.
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[23 Jan 2009|01:57pm] |
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I just want to give a shout out to this dwindling economy for taking away one of my meager guilty pleasures and that's the steam room at the gym. If the shitty job situation wasn't balls enough, Due to budget cuts they've let the cleaning staff at Bally's go. I found this out after I attempted to use it following a brief stint trying out another gym. Upon walking in I was greeted with the smell of 3 week old wet sponge and partially cooked chopped beef teamed up with a slimy floor with bits of (don't ask me why) soapy hair strewn about. Filthy wasn't even the word. I felt like I was inside a crack whores ass. I walked out gagging and angsty.
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[21 Jan 2009|06:15am] |
I don't know why I do it. At the most inopportune moments I mentally revisit funny conversations or moments. What's bad about it is that it's completely uncontrollable and the majority of the time happens when I'm alone. This leads to me fighting back laughter in a public place making me look like a complete lunatic.
Yesterday was no exception, courtesy of Dyanna. She's from New York however once I moved out of England she moved in. We were discussing the differences between the US and the UK and happened to stumble upon the subject of the English welfare system. It is referred to as the dole which any American would find synonymous with fruit. We had a laugh at this as we both immediately thought of tropical fruit when the subject had been raised to us for the first time. It was one remark she made. ONE comment that did it. "Giant government pineapple."
Giant. Government. Pineapple. If that combination of words isn't funny enough, Visions of people waiting in line to receive their giant government issued pineapple popped into my head while I was on the elliptical at the gym. I fought hard until I caught sight of myself mid struggle in the mirrored wall to my left and just lost it completely. AND at peak time no less.
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| This morning |
[18 Jan 2009|11:43am] |
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Wearing fleece pajama's. Knitted socks. In a warm bed. My head on 2 stacked pillows (my fav). A pup nuzzled on either side of me. Reeks of comfy doesn't it? Yeah- A big shout out to the 'for no reason' panic attack that decided to drop by just to piss on my parade and wake me up right. I know my place again. Thanks!
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[16 Jan 2009|03:04pm] |
I diy'd an acid washed denim dress. It was pretty unflattering but now it can be called avant garde *insert snooty laugh*. The main alteration was removing the sleeves and it seemed like such a waste to toss it so I made a bolero!
More shots in the listing.
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[15 Jan 2009|10:00pm] |
Oh my god I am such a creepy domestic freak. Hours at a stretch can be spent in a grocery store. Foreign grocer? Even better! My insight for the day:
*I've decided that the food network has to be the greatest channel on the planet.
*Giada De Laurentiis from Everyday Italian is a chef from which I've taken a few cues from however- I'm finding harder to ignore the fact that she speaks with a borderline valley girl accent yet pronounces words at random as if she's just stepped off the boat. I get it you were born in Rome but give it up already!
*Paula Dean is gonna fucking kill me.
*I need a huge kitchen and way more utensils than what I currently own.
*I want to have get togethers where I get to show my skill and make pretentious food.
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[14 Jan 2009|07:09pm] |
The early 90's are back. Time to break out the c & c music factory.
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pvcvirus's journal
